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第32章 你还记得吗Yellow PostIts by Ishita Vora（第2页）

这些话题似乎永无止境，而我们也永远都不倦怠。

琼妮？米歇尔的那首《ia》反复放了七遍，我们才想起该出去走走了。

但是，突然有一天，我们开始互相找寻。

你总是在别的地方，做着别的事情，奇怪的是，我也一样。

在一次旅途中我结识了一些新朋友，遇到了一个跟我喜欢同一些电影的男生。

你也结识了那个向你请教数学题的邻家女生。

我的房门总是锁着，你的也一样。

我们似乎突然都找到了彼此以外的另一个世界，可悲的是，以前属于我们俩之间的世界就这样被遗弃了。

于是，我们试图补救。

我们常会在宿舍侧楼上大吵大闹，相互僵持好久，然后气愤而绝情地留言。

沮丧、焦虑，甚至是爱，都以最丑陋的方式表现出来。

继而是冷漠、自负和放弃。

我们冷静而理智

地商量着彼此仍继续做朋友，还决定继续告知对方自己的行踪。

也就那时，我开始在门上贴那些黄色便条。

当我回到家时，就会发现便条的空白处有你的新留言。

如果现在我们都

还保留着这些便条，它们一定会更完整地叙述我们的故事。

如今，我回家后依然会在门上贴便条，希望有人将他们的行踪写在上面。

youstillfindthisday，mydear，amongyourpossessions？Amongthesouvenirsofyourtripstofarawaylabooksfromthosehaldayswhenyouwalkedthehallowedportalsofthatengineerihecassetteswhosecoverswereleftbehindafterohosebasessiohephotographsofthoseclassmateswhosenamesyou’tremember？Orisithiddeninthedarkoutofsightalongwiththebookyouboughtbuthegiftyouefoundauseforaersyouneverfi.Istillfihethehouse，whichyouhaveed，iwhereIhaveimagiionswithyou.ItishereevenwhenIamnoouthelightonandthemusig，soIhometotheillusionofpany.Iamprobablybetteroffnow.Withoutsecretstokeepfrommyparents.Withoutsomeoweenmeandmyfriends，meandmypastimes，meandmywork，meandmyseaariahatIkeeptrying，keepfailingtiheexpesthatIkeeptrying，keepfailingtomakemyown.ItisnotthatIalwaysfeellikethis，sometimesIyearnforthosedayswhentearsahcameeasy.Thoseeasyandquisitioodespair.

limentcouldkeepmymindoccupiedforhoursonendandaharshwordcouldpricklikeapinthesameskinwhisdryaive.Likeprobablymillionsaroundtheworld，Ilookoutsidethewindowofacrowdedbus，lostinmyownthoughtsacouldhappentome.WasInotsupposedtobedifferentfromtherest？Notforthesillyschoolgirlinfatuatioballteamorthefaswiththeg，pot-smokingaspiri.Ourswasamaturefriendshipthathadblossomedintomore.HowcouldIfeelapahen，wheahelpinghandtirl，whenyouspokeaboutsomeonewho’sfarawayandabouttobemarried，whenyouweresoihebothatyoudidweallday？Whehatithadbeentoolongandthatweshouldmeet，Icarefullystartedpreparingapackageforyou.

Asmallpoem，thatbookyoualwayswaneverfound，anoldphotographandabarofchocolateforustoshare.earandetalkabout？Thepackagestillremainsiiain.ItwasarainySundayafterinmytinyhostelroom，disgcapitalismandcampusgossipwithequalfevor.Whehoseversationscouldlastforeverandwewouldhem.WhenJoniMitgiaseveinuousplaybeforewethoughtofgettingout.Thenonedaysuddenlywewerelookiher.Youhereelse，doihirangelyenoughsowasI.ThoseonthattripandthatjuniuywholovedthesamemoviesIdo.Thatgirldoorwhotookmathlessonsfromyou.Myroomwasalmostalwayslodyourswas.Weseemedtohavediscoveredawholeworldoutsideofourselvesallofasudderagedywaswehadalsolosttheworldwehadbefore.

&herescuemission.Theloudfightsielwing，thelohedesperatearatioyandevenlitselfipossibleways.Thenindifferenpladresignation.Calm，dispassionatedissoayfriehatweshouldalwayslettheotherknoouldbearound.That’swhenIstartedleavingthoseyellowpost-itsohoseyellowpost-itswhichbythetimeIcamebackwouldhaveyouratesthatIneverused.Ifwehadallofthemnow，theywouldbetellingthistalealotbetterthanIamnow.Bae，Istillueleavistothisday，hopingthatsomeonewillwritetheirwhereaboutsonthemaswell.